Numero 5 - GUATE, GAUTE, GAUTE

I was sad to have to leave Tapachula the next morning. It has that really crazy border town feel about it, where anything & everything is possible. Being only 20min from the Gautemalan border was just to tempting not to cross. The trip thus far has been filled with surprises. None of the stereotypes associated with Central America had at this point been proven to be true, however upon reaching the border, the mad rush from local touk-touk drivers to get your bag, the illegal money exchange dealers & all the other madness you can imagine, awaited me at the Guatemala/El Salvador border. Before that though, the immigration post had to be conquered. And at this point my first problem arrived. Upon arrival in Mexico City I was handed a tiny (well to make me feel less like a tit I call it that) piece of tourist ticket. A ticket, which had long since disappeared along the long roads between Mexico City & the border. That was however a real problem. Without that ticket, crossing the border was not possible. At this point a local guy who was going the other way approached me. Realising my lack of Spanish he communicated with the immigration official. After 10min it was discovered that crossing the border was indeed possible, but only possible if a certain amount was paid. I had decided that I would get rid of most of my local currency before entering new countries & just get the new currency once over the border. I didn’t want the hassle of money exchange. That plan had backfired though, as the fee to cross the border was 250 pesos. I had at this point, only 40 pesos, since Guatemala has there own currency I didn’t see the need to have more. My local translator, Regerio, who had just sorted out his own documentation to cross the border, then approached me offering to pay the fee. I was blown away at this point by this total stranger’s generosity. For a complete stranger to just help out was another one of those moments. He even refused to give me his bank details so that I could pay him back as soon as I got across.

After that fantastic moment, the madness of the border then started. When crossing the border with a backpack, it sends out immediate signals to all the circling vultures, just waiting to take advantage of unsuspecting prey, a.k.a ‘The Gringo’. I was at this point still in awe of the generosity I had just experienced so my guard was temporarily down. That’s all they needed, & before I could prepare for the onslaught they pounced. Resistance was futile & I consigned myself to the fact that today they had got the better of me.

The unsuspecting prey a.k.a ‘Me’, was then driven off to the closest town where upon I was thoroughly overcharged by the driver. The town, ‘Nameless’ as it would become known to me as, since nobody could actually give me the name of the bloody place, was like Britney Spears 10yrs ago. Sweat & cute on the outside, but not much after that.

I checked into a motel that seemed too good to be true, & usually when it seems that way it usually is that way. It wasn't that bad in the sunshine of the day, however when the sun went down the roaches came out. I did to be fair, after slaying a few roaches & then overloading the room with insect repellent, sleep like the dead.

Waking up with remnants of insect repellent still lingering around, I had a cold shower. In these sweltering conditions, la ducha caliente is not even an option.

After having my now obligatory language misunderstanding when buying some bread for the road, I was off.

Unlike Mexico with its well constructed highways, imagine taking a stick & pulling a line through some grass in your back garden, that’s the best way to describe the Guatemalan highway. Your trip is always accompanied by walls of trees & forest to your left & right, with the odd river or mountain side interrupting the continuity of the surrounds. Quincho, the driver of the pick-up that had stopped to give me a ride, was as silent as the view was spectacular. He also had a liking for Mozart. So with Mozart concerto & the Guatemalan country side putting her best foot forward, the 4hr road to Guatemala City passed by.

Guatemala City unfortunately did not have much more to offer than all the other Central American cities I had seen thus far. The city centre was awash with markets selling all that you could want & more. The square had its normal ensample cast of government offices flanked by cathedrals. The main city cathedral did have something I hadn’t seen before. When the Conquistadors came visiting all those years back, they needed away of getting the indigenous people to accept the gospel. So as a p.r stunt, they put a black Jesus in the church, so as to get the native Indians to follow something they could relate with.

One thing I didn’t expect from 'Gaute', local slang for Gautemala, was the amount of up-market cars & especially 4 by 4’s that drove by. I didn’t expect a back water town; but I didn’t expect the latest BMW & Audi models either.

 So after that surprise, I headed for Antigua. About 30min south west, Antigua's claim to fame is the volcano’s peering over the town. So after having missed out on some volcano spotting in Mexico, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to see Pacaya volcano.

My dress for this expedition would not necessarily be in the standard mountain hiking catalogues.

Not your standard hicking shoe's But with vision of Shackleton & Hillary in my mind, I set off to conquer the beast. After 45min I felt more like Frodo Baggins, the landscape resembling a land long lost & forgotten. I was expecting to see ‘The Eye’ from ‘Lord of the Rings’ to appear in the distance. We stopped about 1 kilometre from the top. Not due to my lack of enthusiasm at all, but more due to the lack of fitness of the rest of the ‘fellowship of the ring’. The mountain feels very much alive, with small caves feeling more like a sauna’s once inside & small crevasses sending heat out that’s hot enough to get marshmallows all hot & bothered.

Sauna holes with heating steaming out.
Eventually re-routing via a different path the fellowship made it to the top of an adjacent mountain. And the view, spectacular!

Pacaya
The following morning with exploits of the previous day still very much in mind I hit the road. With El Salvador very much on the horizon, I bid farewell to a place that had disappointed & blown me away at the same time.

Until that day …….